Anyone will tell you that planning a wedding is no mean fete. The only relief would be to have non-fussy parents and relatives, awesome friends and a relaxed attitude to the whole affair.
The truths revealed at such time are a true testament to “a friend in need is a friend indeed”.
Who your true friends are.
Let’s face it, we all hate to contribute financially at weddings. The first thought is that the couple ought to plan themselves better. However, the reality is that you don’t contribute for the couple. You contribute for yours and others’ fanfare on the day. Imagine if your closest friend decided to get married and the couple had a tiny wedding at the attorney general’s office just by themselves and moved on with their lives and told you later. Would you feel left out or happy for them? Do you think their family would be happy or would feel unimportant and ignored and angry? Weddings exist for family and friends and not just for the couple. Society has created an expectation that we need to celebrate the union and therefore the couple is under pressure to either oblige or opt to damage relationships. It therefore should be a no-brainer that the first thing you should do for your friends is offer monetary support.
What kind of giving are people willing to make on your behalf?
Don’t be surprised if the people whom you count on the most are the least willing to take on any tasks towards the success in your wedding. Be ready for the pleasant surprise when you get unexpected people offering their time, effort and money towards your day. People give differently and you ought to open your mind to accommodate this and be aware of those who do not give.
Which friends exist for good times only
They will show up for the wedding, dance and have a good time but will play no part in making it happen. That is, they won’t contribute monetarily and definitely won’t show up for any committee meeting or take up any tasks on the day.
Relatives and friends to avoid
I don’t believe relatives and close friends need special invitation cards to weddings and yet, there are those who will feel affronted if you do not perform for them at this level. They create theatrics around your day just to make things difficult. You must buy them clothes, must hire a bus, give them time to say something etc and yet, if you really think about it, your relatives and friends should be the most supportive and giving because they know you and have a longer lasting relationship to maintain. They should be the first to sympathize with the financial and mental weight of the day and not the cause of stress. Best believe that if they stress you at this time, they always will. Do your best to avoid them.
How people rank you in their lives
Don’t be surprised to discover that you are not your best friends’ best friend. You may have showed up at his/her wedding and chaired the committee only to discover that on your day, they can’t spare the effort and time. I think the most surprising are those that do not show up and do not apologize or excuse themselves. I really take that as a cue to exit the friendship. After all, how many more once in a lifetime days do you really get?
Megs' 