Madness haunts me

Is it a curse or for all my intelligence, am i just emotionally daft?
Recently i seem drawn to emotionally unavailable men. tsk!! am embarrassed to even admit it. Its like am constantly heading to a future that i know will hurt me but i still do it anyway. Being intelligent doesn’t mean that i make intelligent decisions.
On the one hand, i have my folks picking their brains on what they did wrong about my single status and on the other, there is me, happily single, dreading the courting period and being drawn to unavailable men. tsk tsk!!
The job is however at an all time high, so busy and full of energy. I feel alive in that area. Projects underway and so much to accomplish. Ofcourse, i could always use more money!! (sigh)
What i really need help with is my studies, how am i supposed to do a paper if i am unable to focus for even an hour and study or do something constructive. I think exam based papers were easier to handle than this. I need to start reading newspapers and maybe its time i started watching TV, time to catch up with current affairs.
So much going on…still me…